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Satire: Climate Collision

Satire: Climate Collision

Michel Martinez, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

On June 27, 2025, Disney will be releasing a movie of favorite onscreen characters, Olaf (voiced by Josh Gad) and Stitch (voiced by Chris Sanders), entitled "Climate Collision." The movie will be about...

Satire: Software Students Face Reality

Satire: Software Students Face Reality

Yanasely Jaco, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Beginning on April 2, Brentwood High School will provide graphic design students with a chance to stretch their creativity. The district has purchased new software with “depth defying quality” that...

Satire: Brentwood Adopts Blobfish as New Mascot

Satire: Brentwood Adopts Blobfish as New Mascot

David Castro, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

New year, new mascot. Please welcome the Brentwood blobs! Brentwood is experimenting with a new mascot due to mandates that require districts to change team names that relate to Native Americans. The...

Satire: Football Field to Become Geese Sanctuary

Satire: Football Field to Become Geese Sanctuary

Mariana Arboleda, Editor-in-Chief March 30, 2023

Tired of being chased by geese? Now they will be confined to the football field, categorized as a new protected habitat for the geese roaming on our school grounds. Starting in May, the football field...

Satire: The British are Coming to Brentwood

Satire: The British are Coming to Brentwood

Mia Espinal, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

On April 7, 2023, Brentwood High School will be replacing their normal security team with British Royal guards. The school wants to implement more high-end security in the school to assist with the cheeky...

Satire: Brentwood High School Institutes “Teach the Parent Day”

Satire: Brentwood High School Institutes “Teach the Parent Day”

Tatiana Gonzalez, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Do you ever feel like your parents don’t understand your academic struggles? Starting May 1, 2023, Brentwood High School will be holding a monthly “Teach the Parent” Day.   Parents will follow...

Satire: New Human Interaction Exhibit Coming Soon

Satire: New Human Interaction Exhibit Coming Soon

Amna Naqvi March 30, 2023

                                                                       Come one, come all, to the new Human Interaction Exhibit. Animals of all ages can roam around...

Satire: Students Teach EnglishZ

Satire: Students Teach EnglishZ

Edwin Gomez, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Ever thought teachers are lame and un-relatable? Me too! Starting next school year, BHS will be implementing a new course, EnglishZ. This class will be taught by students to teachers, and they will...

Satire: Four New Cyber Diseases Spread through Brentwood

Satire: Four New Cyber Diseases Spread through Brentwood

Sophia Chavez, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Four different diseases are plaguing the students at Brentwood High School, spreading through cyber media. Students have reported dry, red eyes and thumbs sticking like glue to their phones. One of...

Satire: 2024 Senior Trip Relocates to Chuck E. Cheese

Satire: 2024 Senior Trip Relocates to Chuck E. Cheese

Nicole Rodriguez, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Attention all upcoming seniors: Ready to feel the nostalgia of your childhood? On October 27, 2023, the senior trip will be located at Chuck E. Cheese from 11 a.m. - 9 p.m. There'll be no more of those...

Satire: Brentwood High School Adds 10th Period to Bell Schedule

Satire: Brentwood High School Adds 10th Period to Bell Schedule

Karina Mauricio, Staff Writer March 30, 2023

Tired of nine periods? Too bad, because Brentwood High School is adding a tenth period next school year. If all goes well, the Freshman Center may adopt this change in the future.  The Brentwood administrators...

Satire: Seniors Should Be Grateful for the Pandemic

Satire: Seniors Should Be Grateful for the Pandemic

Nicole Olekanma, Staff Writer March 24, 2021

The Covid-19 pandemic has completely changed the senior experience. For half the year, seniors were able to either be fully remote or only come to school two to three days a week. The seniors haven’t even caught...

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